Why She’s A Miss

Someone left a comment (I don’t know who you are because you didn’t leave your name – sadness) on yesterday’s post asking if I was just referring to our soon come (as they say in Jamaica when you ask ‘how long?’) baby as a “she” or if we actually know it’s going to be a girl. It’s a good question.

We know it’s going to be a girl, and no, we don’t know the mother. We know it’s going to be a girl because we were asked what we wanted, how old etc, etc. This is a fairly normal thing when starting an adoption. When you do your dossier, if no child has been pre-selected – as in you aren’t adopting for the sake of adopting a specific child you already know of – you get to answer questions about what kind of child you want. What sex, if it matters? How old? Medical issues you’re willing to take on? Things like that. During our first meeting with John and Beth they asked us all those questions and now they’re just waiting for the baby that fits what we’ve asked for to come along. Thus the hurry up and wait that we find ourselves in now. It could be days. It could be weeks. It could be months. We’re pretty confident, as are John and Beth that it won’t actually be all that long because they have mothers or families coming to them regularly and they end up turning a lot of people away because they just aren’t set up to take tons of kids. They believe in giving quality care that will help prep the kids they do take for the transition to their new families. With adoptions being all over the map right now they’re limiting even more the number of kids they’re taking because they aren’t able to start working with any new families until things start to move again with adoption processing. It looks like that might be happening from some of the blogs that I’ve read, but with Haiti anything is possible and nothing is consistent.

Once a baby does arrive that fits what we’re looking for – a girl, as close to newborn as possible (probably about a month or so old) and no major health issues, John and Beth will give us a call to confirm that we want to take that particular child. When we agree they’ll take her into their care for about 5-6 days so they can get all the medical tests and lab work done for her file, then we get to bring her home. There was a chance that a baby was going to come while we were away and in that case John and Beth would have emailed us, we would have signed off on it, they would have gone ahead with everything and we would have picked her up on the way home. Now that we’re back I’m glad that wasn’t the case because it would have been pretty hairy. We’ve had a bit of time to settle in, unpack, clean the house etc and now I feel like we’d be ready to get the call, whenever it does come. It’s all very exciting, and kind of like waiting for labor to start, but not my labor :) Not this time anyway.

To those of you that prayed for our bags to show up, or were just praying for God to meet us yesterday in the midst of things here – THANKS! There was a weird turn of events yesterday. We found out from our friend that was going to check on them that the plane was coming in later in the day, which seemed weird because there’s only one flight from Ft. Lauderdale each day, and he said it was coming at 4 pm, not 10:50 am like usual. On a whim I checked the flight info yesterday afternoon and it turns out the flight was *delayed* 4 hours and was in fact arriving around 2:20 pm.

It was 2:15 when I checked so Chris made a quick decision and took a risk. He hopped in the truck, met Mike around Williamson to grab the claim form, and headed to Port hoping that the bags had arrived. This is not something that he would normally do, just drive to Port for a quick turn around trip for one thing. If he didn’t though, and the bags did arrive, it would mean having to deal with the people over at the warehouse tomorrow, where everything gets moved to at the end of the day, rather than just being able to walk into the terminal to claim them which is easy. I got a call at 3:55 pm with him telling me he was on his way home – bags in truck! Wahoo! He made it home in record time and was chilling out reading a book while I finished making dinner.

Pretty much everything is unpacked. It was nice to put baby clothes in drawers, to pack a diaper bag with diapers and clothes that would fit a Haitian wee one (their average birth weight is around 5.5-6.5 lbs.) and to get sleeping places set up. We were really blessed to be given a great play yard/play pen and Chris’ Mum and I went and did some shopping to get some last bits. Consignment stores are great for finding used things in great shape. I got a Fisher Price Rainforest bouncer seat with all the bells and whistles for about half the price. Anyway, it’s all in the baby’s room, things are organized and sorted and now we’re really ready. And now the waiting is harder :( I think I’m just going to try to remind myself of all the sleep I’m getting now that I won’t be getting later.

On a weather note, it’s cold this morning. The wind has been blowing since last night and it’s chilly. Just to give you an idea – I’m wearing jeans, slippers and a t-shirt and wishing I had a sweater on. I may go get one actually. I am, however, going to appreciate this while it lasts because it’s only going to be a few months before it starts to get yucky hot again.


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About Leslie

I'm Leslie. Wife. Mother. Missionary. In the day to day my husband and I are responsible for running Clean Water for Haiti, a humanitarian mission that builds and distributes water filters to Haitian families. Living in Haiti full time provides lots of stories, and as I tell my husband, our grandkids probably won't believe most of them. Maybe writing them down will give me some credibility.

5 thoughts on “Why She’s A Miss

  1. HI Leslie: Do you have to go through IBESR and all that like people who live here in the states do? Of course the difference being that you get to parent your daughter while waiting…???Thanks!Kim

  2. Hi Kim,Yes, we have to go through IBESR and the whole process that everyone else goes through once they file their papers with the Haitian government, but as you said, we get to parent our little girl while we’re doing it. It’s a bit riskier doing it that way because like anyone else we could be rejected. That in mind though we still feel like God is saying go forward.

  3. Leslie….sorry no name yesterday in my “why is she a “she”?” question. Just in a hurry and didn’t think you’d care who left the comment because I’ve been a lurker. I’m Kris…one of Tara’s friends from IL. I have three birth kids and two adopted kids from Haiti (2002). I thought, perhaps, you were already following a pregnancy with your future birthmom. Thanks for sharing!

  4. Since there is that risk with being rejected, I will make sure we are keeping that in our prayers as well, as we pray for you when we see your pic on our fridge! Take care,Kim

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